Agenda verses Plan
One of the things that I learned in the recent Waterhole Rituals Insider Circle class with Carolyn Resnick is that it is best to not have an agenda with a horse. I think that part of this is because horses are so expert at picking up what our agenda is and then attempting to change it to maintain control of the situation. Having an agenda can be perceived as being self-serving and therefore in the dominance realm of the Horse's code.
The definition of agenda is: a list or program of things to be done or considered. I have noticed that Gunny is expert at picking up what my agenda is and then attempting to take control of it in a way that he is still "more or less complying" but in control. Usually it is by attempting to go faster or slower than me. So I have started to recognize when this is happening and realize that it is my clue that one or both of us has an agenda.
The tricky part is to figure out how to still get done what you want to get done but without an agenda. This is where having a plan comes in. The definition of plan as a verb is: to think out, to prepare in advance. This definition feels a little more flexible. And I think that is the key, to have a general plan that includes some strategies for things that you think might be likely to happen. And then be willing and able to adjust on the fly, depending on the mood and thoughts of the horse. This is where experience comes in too, the more experience you can draw on, the more strategies you have available when you need to adjust in the moment.
When I have a general plan in mind, but allow the conversation to take place between Gunny and I, then things go more smoothly. If Gunny starts to attempt to take over, then it is a good time to change focus in some way. Maybe this means we need to pause for a long time, or do something slightly different than what he thought the next step was. Flowing in our communication in this way makes our interactions be more of a conversation. Just like having a conversation with a person, you might have some general topics you want to cover, but the direction and outcome of the conversation depend on how the other person responds.
The definition of agenda is: a list or program of things to be done or considered. I have noticed that Gunny is expert at picking up what my agenda is and then attempting to take control of it in a way that he is still "more or less complying" but in control. Usually it is by attempting to go faster or slower than me. So I have started to recognize when this is happening and realize that it is my clue that one or both of us has an agenda.
The tricky part is to figure out how to still get done what you want to get done but without an agenda. This is where having a plan comes in. The definition of plan as a verb is: to think out, to prepare in advance. This definition feels a little more flexible. And I think that is the key, to have a general plan that includes some strategies for things that you think might be likely to happen. And then be willing and able to adjust on the fly, depending on the mood and thoughts of the horse. This is where experience comes in too, the more experience you can draw on, the more strategies you have available when you need to adjust in the moment.
When I have a general plan in mind, but allow the conversation to take place between Gunny and I, then things go more smoothly. If Gunny starts to attempt to take over, then it is a good time to change focus in some way. Maybe this means we need to pause for a long time, or do something slightly different than what he thought the next step was. Flowing in our communication in this way makes our interactions be more of a conversation. Just like having a conversation with a person, you might have some general topics you want to cover, but the direction and outcome of the conversation depend on how the other person responds.
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